Let's Recap the 8 Weeks of January

Or should I say the entire year it took for January to conclude?

Hey there lovelies!

I know I missed sending out this newsletter last week but I just needed a mental health break. No literally, I took some time off to just breathe into my new mental health diagnosis.

That’s right, I finally sought help for what was plaguing my mental and emotional landscape and you know what? I’m so happy I did.

Last Tuesday I had a psychiatric evaluation—I knew the despair I felt in December was a new low I’d never escape otherwise. Overall my experience at CCAC (a government ran mental health-care facility in the Bahamas) was exceptional.

Naturally, I wrote about the freedom that came with finally understanding the illness ravishing my mind. Another thing I had to do last week which was health-related and ordered by my psychiatrist had a lot of lab work done to rule out any physical illness that could be contributing to my ailing mental health. Spending half the day at the hospital through me into a tailspin where I finally needed to admit that I’m experiencing reverse culture shock. I was also irritated when a medium user decided to mansplain my rape to me.

January

This month was hard for me. Landing home on the last day of 2019 threw me into flux and I’m finally getting my bearings. Thanks mostly impart to starting treating for depression, panic disorder and possibly bipolar 2. My psychiatrist hasn’t ruled it out as yet so that’s why I’m saying it’s still on the table.

I hardly wrote in January, rightly so, I just needed to come to terms with living with my family again after almost 10 years of not being in this house. It’s been an adjustment period but now that I’ve carved out space and have enough alone time to be at peace, I’m okay.

Being here triggered me a lot at first and it dredged up a lot of memories that left me feeling like I had an emotional hangover. Nevertheless, I’m happy 3459 days of January are now over.

Welcome to February!!

As promised this month we’re going to be rolling out a subscription for paid content on this newsletter!! I’m planning on writing and publishing every day on Medium!

On my main account where I use my actual name, and I plan on writing 3 times a week on my secondary account where I use a pen name.

I’ve briefly written about my struggles with writing here and here because of mental illness but now that I’ve started taking medication I feel like the brain fog is lifting.

I’ve written every day since February began so I am hoping that my focus will ensure I’m more on target. To piggyback on my essay talking about being mansplained about rape, I wrote about why people automatically blame the victim.

I’ve been thinking about my sexuality and how I lost my virginity. It made me realize that myths about the social construct of virginity fueled biphobia and bi-erasure. Finally, yesterday I was triggered by Steve Harvey giving relationship advice.


Friend Links to Medium Stories Mentioned

Here are FREE Medium links to my stories for non-medium members. Remember you can clap up to 50 times to help my stories have a higher distribution.

An Internet Troll Mansplained My Rape to Me

Curated in Women and Equality

How to Deal With Reverse Culture Shock

Curated in Travel and Mental Health

The Liberating Power of A Mental Health Diagnosis

Curated in Mental Health

Why We Default to Victim Blaming

Curated in Psychology and Women

Social Virginity Myths Fueled My Internalized Biphobia

Curated in LGBTQ and Sexuality

Why You Shouldn’t Take Relationship Advice from Steve Harvey


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Thank being said this is not a sob story. What we’re doing here is transactional. I will still be sending out free emails from this account but I’d like to create paid content that will help and entertain you.

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Thank you for being here! We’ll be back again for freewheeling Friday since I missed last week.

Candidly,

Nicole