Hey there Welcome to Why? Wednesday! Thanks for being here…let’s discuss!
How often do you judge others for things you've grown past and forgiven in yourself?
I’ve had to check myself on this a lot over there years. It’s so easy to slip into judgment when you’ve moved up the ladder on self-growth. For example, I’ve found myself judging others who start a new activity that leads to self-growth once I’ve passed that stage in the past and then once I’ve grown again I see the error of my ways. Why do we tend to judge others who aren’t where we are?
I saw a quote yesterday from Brianna Wiest, it said, "Judgement is always a projection of our innermost fears. When we think we are not enough, we try to make someone else even less."
This projection in terms of judging others for things you've outgrown can also be grounded in fear of becoming who you once were. People will shut down when we judge them and not take our advice or listen to the lessons we've learned from once being where they were. This is where thinking before you speak can be such a great asset to help you avoid judging others and instead impart your experienced backed knowledge in a way that is helpful and without judgment.
I get this way too! It’s painful to see people struggling but difficult when you can see where they could be helped.....and then I remember who am I to decide where someone should be on their journey?
That's the rub, isn't it? For me I used to get really self-righteous about it I think and then speak to them from that place. It's insufferable and people tend to not want to hear what you have to say even if you're being helpful.
Great insights Nicole, thank you. I wish I knew them earlier in my life.
I’ve been accused as judgmental from a person really important in my life, which I finally lost.
In retrospect, I reflected on the drivers of my behavior; it’s all about our own insecurities and fears.
I learned so much from this experience; and wanted to add, that sometimes is better to stay silent, and just listen. Give it the time it takes for the other party to return on the matter, ask opinion, participation, or help.
I saw a quote yesterday from Brianna Wiest, it said, "Judgement is always a projection of our innermost fears. When we think we are not enough, we try to make someone else even less."
This projection in terms of judging others for things you've outgrown can also be grounded in fear of becoming who you once were. People will shut down when we judge them and not take our advice or listen to the lessons we've learned from once being where they were. This is where thinking before you speak can be such a great asset to help you avoid judging others and instead impart your experienced backed knowledge in a way that is helpful and without judgment.
I get this way too! It’s painful to see people struggling but difficult when you can see where they could be helped.....and then I remember who am I to decide where someone should be on their journey?
That's the rub, isn't it? For me I used to get really self-righteous about it I think and then speak to them from that place. It's insufferable and people tend to not want to hear what you have to say even if you're being helpful.
i sometimes wonder about peoples actions or decisions but i try not to be judgemental
Great insights Nicole, thank you. I wish I knew them earlier in my life.
I’ve been accused as judgmental from a person really important in my life, which I finally lost.
In retrospect, I reflected on the drivers of my behavior; it’s all about our own insecurities and fears.
I learned so much from this experience; and wanted to add, that sometimes is better to stay silent, and just listen. Give it the time it takes for the other party to return on the matter, ask opinion, participation, or help.
I agree with you completely Alex. Sometimes it truly is better to be silent, listen and reflect.
how are u Kristi
if i know the person and its usully a family relative or friend i do try to encourage making a postive change in their life